Twenty Twelve. See ya. Part One.

2012 has turned into a year of big changes and developments for me, both personally and professionally.

There have been major losses. Some of these hurt like hell at the time – I got dumped by a supposedly close friend when I was desperately (as in my survival was touch and go) ill in intensive care. Apparently taking care of my seriously ill husband wasn’t a good enough reason for not being available to take her shopping. And as for warning her that she was being taken for a ride by a conman, well that’s the worst thing you can do to someone you love, isn’t it? And to really twist the knife, she wrote to my mum telling her that I deserved to be in the ICU. Talk about picking your moments. But thank you, Elizabeth. Your absence in my life has given me the time, resources and faith in myself to not only start my own business, but for it to succeed. Your negativity held me back, but now it has gone and there is no stopping me now.

The murder of an old friend back in the spring will always leave a hole in my heart. Alan was such a support to me when I first got diagnosed with diabetes, and always had good advice about looking after myself. He did used to tell me off for riding my motorbike too fast, but I always said it was only cos he couldn’t keep up! Or maybe it was because he couldn’t touch the ground with both feet when he sat on my Speed Triple? We had some hilarious times, and I’ll miss him always.

I cried buckets over both. They happened in the same week. In retrospect some people are best remembered with great fondness and others best forgotten. My own very-near-death experience in May has made me much less tolerant of users, bullshitters and insincerity. I even told my nasty bitch of a sister in law where to get off today. Her only input into my life was negative, snide, bitchiness and generally being horrible. So I got rid. Bye.

I have made some wonderful new friends since the nearly being dead thing. We all inspire each other. They give me as much as I give them – and that’s a new thing for me. They support me in such practical ways, like having my son for an hour or two to enable me to get that commission finished, or pitch up with a bottle of wine and a box of Maltesers. Or just take the piss 🙂 Sal, Mag, Esther & co, what can I say?

This new confidence in dealing with what life has thrown at me this year (there is loads more, but how much more do you wanna know? I mean REALLY?) has made me feel pretty much unfuckingstoppable. I have approached people I would never have dared to before. I have pitched business ideas to rock gods. Done work for film. Basically thought “what the hell”, felt the fear and done it anyway. I have faith in myself and my ideas… Almost certainly some of them will fail. But I reckon enough of them will succeed. And that’ll be the next bit…

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4 responses to “Twenty Twelve. See ya. Part One.

  • silverstitches50

    Hi Mel, I am so sorry to hear of all the things that have happened to you this year and I can sympathise and empathise, I have had a bad year too having to give up my home of 30 years to move to somewhere completely alien and strange but within several weeks I have made some new friends who have been a great support, you being one of them. Although we have only me 2 or 3 times I follow you on facebook and your ‘antics’ (lol) have spurred me on to make my new life here work. Also having health issues as well fortunately not serious but enough to begin to affect my life and ability to do things. You have set up a magical business and I have spread your details to my daughter & daughter IL as its there kind of stuff. Let us both make 2013 a new year to go forward in and make our life rich and fulfilled…………………..That is if the world doesn’t end a week on Friday!!! BIG LOL

    • Melanie de Castro Pugh

      Thank you Helen, I’m looking forward to getting to know you much better in 2013, because I think you’re LOVELY xxx I’m cooking up an idea for the new year that I’d really like you to be part of, so watch this space 🙂 Really hoping the world doesn’t end on Friday, I’m a bit busy for Armageddon!

  • Mum

    Mel I am so proud of what you have achieved in the past twelve months and I KNOW this is just the start xxxxx

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